Hey There Stranger...

I have been a complete failure in the blogosphere. I really just haven't had much of an urge to write lately. That is what usually drives me to sit down and blog, the urge for me to sit down and free my mind of whatever thoughts are stuck there. I warn you before you read this post that I have no clue where it will go as my mind likes to go on it's own after I have not written in awhile.

Life for me these days is going pretty good. No classes, work is great, and aside from the usual drama of the McConnell family not much to complain about in that part of my life either. My town is kinda quiet as the majority of college students are all gone for the Summer which includes a large portion of my own friends and so my social life has quieted down compared to what it was before the spring semester ended.

Hustle and bustle can be a good thing sometimes, but I prefer the easy pace of the Summer. Everyone seems less grumpier during the Summer when there is less traffic and it is easier to get from one place to another. I feel like it is just easier to breath and relax.

Breath and relax. The best place to breath and relax for me is easily during Eucharistic Adoration. There are times when I forget how amazing sitting with Jesus really is. I sometimes forget how much I have needed that time with Jesus until I am sitting there with Him in the silence of the church. I feel like that is the only place I can really put my life in the right focus, and that is really how it should be, keeping Jesus at the center of my life. It's not that I don't try, but I am human, and life happens and before I know it I am lost and am very lucky to have my faith life to help me become centered again. I lay it all out there and leave it with Him while Adoring Him in the Blessed Sacrament and I feel so much lighter after because I know that He has it all covered. He knows what is best for me and I will be ok.

"How sweet, the presence of Jesus to the longing harassed soul! It is instant peace, and balm to every wound." ~St. Elizabeth Seton~

Bringing Jesus To The Streets Of IU Campus

This past Tuesday was another Eucharistic Procession. It was easily the smallest group we have had for this event. I believe only around seventy people, which is not that much considering there have been a couple of hundreds in the past. I believe it is because it was not very well advertised this year. I had heard about it only one week before, which is not the case in past years. Even though it was a more intimate group of people I believe it still had a large impact on those who saw our little procession.
It was somewhat of a frustrating day for me before the procession. The weather was looking pretty nasty and we were all worried that it would be even more stormy as the time for the procession rolled around. I had a lot of friends who would not make it praying that the weather would be nice for those of us who were going. Even more important that it would not start raining as we were all in the middle of processing through IU campus as we did not want to put Jesus in the middle of nasty weather. Thankfully everyone's prayers were heard because right about the time it was to begin the sky cleared and it was gorgeous the rest of the evening. It was a wonderful blessing.

The One Thing I Could Not Live A Day Without

Photo Challenge
Day 14

A picture of someone you could never imagine your life without


The one thing I could not live a day without is my God and my Catholic faith. Everywhere I go I know that the one place that will feel most like home is where a Catholic Church is. My faith is the most important part of what makes me who I am. I am nothing without the wonderful people that make up the Church family.

I feel blessed to live in a country where I am able to go to Mass without being told I cannot go... although with what happened in Chicago it is easy to see that Catholics here are still put down for what the Church stands for. I am so saddened every time I think about the fact that the protesters were not stopped by the authorities. I know that is not much compared to what Catholics deal with in China and other communist countries, but it is still sad to know it was allowed to happen here. It is time to still keep my head up and walk tall and not be afraid to say I am a Catholic. I also have the freedom to believe what I do and I will keep those who do not like my faith and what it stands for in my prayers. I can't fight hate with hate. Love is what will win in the end.

Have You Prayed About Your Vocation Recently???

As I said in my previous post, this week is Vocation Awareness Week. Last night at "holy" hour we talked all about vocations and ways to really go about understanding what God is calling us to do in our lives. There was a panel of three guests, a priest, and then a couple who are engaged to be married this May. It was interesting to really learn each one of their stories. I particularly enjoyed hearing the young woman's story because it helped affirm how I have been discerning God's call in my own life. She never has really spent her time discerning about being called as a nun. Instead each time she has had to make a choice in her life she discerned whether that is what God was wanting her to choose. When it came to becoming engaged she discerned whether she was called to spend the rest of her life with her fiancee. Before she was engaged both her and her boyfriend did a novena for over a month and spent time together going to Mass and in eucharistic adoration to figure out if marriage was what God was calling them too.

I found this story very insightful for myself. Like her, I have not really thought too seriously on becoming a nun. Not that I have totally closed the door on that idea, but right at this moment I have not felt that being a nun or sister is my calling. With every big choice I have I also go to God in prayer about it. I pray a lot before making a decision. The more I sit in prayer with God, the more I feel peace with my life and the direction I am going right now. I know that if and when it comes time in a relationship to think about marriage I want to take this girl's advice. I want to really pray about that with the person I am in a relationship with before a proposal officially happens.

One question that was asked was how to decipher which answers come from God and which ones come from the devil. It is always tricky to figure out. Father said that the more we pray about our vocation then the choice that really fills us with peace and fulfillment is the answer he believes comes from God. The devil will always be there trying to make a person turn away from God's path, but the more we rely on God while spending quality quiet time with Him and talk with a mentor/close family and friends (when I say close, I really mean a select few people who really know YOU best and who you are comfortable sharing yourself with) about the discernment process the more it will help drown out the devil.

After the discussion we spent some time in Eucharistic Adoration which was a perfect way to help digest all that we had listened too.

Vocations Awareness Week 2011

This week happens to be Vocations Awareness Week.... So I have found this great video about ways to discern your vocation...

My First Communion :)

The above picture is of my first communion class. I stole it from my friend's blog. I am the fifth kid from the right in the front row.

Looking at this picture really makes me realize that God will place people into your life at the best times. My really good friend, whom I stole this photo from, ended up receiving three of the sacraments together; First Communion, First Reconciliation, and Confirmation. Funny thing about this is the fact that we did not know each other at all throughout those years. I mean I remember seeing him around during Confirmation classes, but not at all from the other two sacraments. It was not until we were both in college that we met on a retreat and really got to know each other. I just find it a bit interesting to think about, myself. :)

Feeling Just A Little Frustrated...

There are times when I feel defeated while trying to help the youth at my parish. Just yesterday was our Eucharistic Adoration night for the high schoolers. We had announcements for it at Mass, in the confirmation classes, and even in our small groups. With all the publicity about this first big night it was pretty hard for us when NO high schoolers attended. We had two grad students come and join us along with an older woman, but not who we were hoping to see. It is times like that when I feel the most frustrated. I have heard from these kids time and time again how they want to do more with the youth group, and yet when it comes down to it they don't show. It was hard for all of us college students to take time out of our hectic schedules to plan this and carry it out. It felt like wasted time. Not actually being in adoration, but the planning of it. I know that this is pretty much a self-pity blog, but I am really frustrated. Hopefully when we plan our next event there will be some sort of turn-out. I just gotta keep praying because in the back of my mind I know that God will help get the kids that need it the most there.

Striving For Sainthood Through Little Ways

The other night I was hanging out with my friends and we began discussing how we are all called to be saints. We then bounced around different ideas on how we can work on making Catholics have a positive rap here in my liberal college town. So, here is the list we came up with...

Remember to smile. Everyone enjoys seeing a happy friendly face.
Listen patiently when someone needs to talk... after listening, instead of forcing advice on a person offer to pray together about what the other person needed to talk about. Bring problems to God.
No matter where we go to eat remember to always pray... and when we make the sign of the cross before and after make sure it is not a quick gesture, but a proud one.
Volunteer helping out at the local community kitchen or homeless shelter
whenever we meet someone to always think in our heads "you are worthy of being loved." By thinking this hopefully it will help us remember the other person is also loved by God.
Invite a friend to Mass
Always strive to learn more about our faith so that when people do come to us with a question we can be prepared. At the same time there is no way we can know everything there is to our faith. Part of being Catholic is knowing that we don't know everything, but we want to learn as well. It is a lifelong learning process.
Try not to gossip. this is a hard one, but the more we avoid talking about people behind their backs the more people will begin to respect us.
Dress modestly, but in a confident manner.
Be polite and courteous.
Be proud to do things like the Eucharistic Procession...
Enjoy wearing catholic t-shirts, or retreat t-shirts.
When in a group of friends who want to do things that are anti-catholic try to suggest to them in a friendly manner something else to do. If they don't want to go along with you, that's fine. Just politely say you are not interested in that and excuse yourself from their plans.
Remember to be a role model for those who you never know are looking up to you. Do not do something that you would regret seeing a younger person, or peer do.

These are just a few of the points we thought up. I wish I could tell you I remember them all, but I don't. We talked about a LOT of different ways.

My Life is Crazy

I have just realized I have not really blogged once this whole week. I have been one busy girl with hardly any free-time.... So what am I up too?!?!?

Monday

9:00 - 5:30: work
6:00 - 7:30: class
7:30 - 8:15: quick dinner with a friend
8:30 - 11:30: colt's game (I know... some may say sad excuse, but those people are not colt's fans...)

Tuesday

8:30 - 8:45: Vote!
9:00 - 5:30: work
5:30 - 6:15: Mass
6:30 - 7:15: Youth group Eucharistic Adoration planning meeting
7:30 - 8:00: work-out
8:00 - ?: Reading Homework

Wednesday

9:00 - 5:30: Work
6:00 - 7:00: Confirmation Facilitator's Meeting
7:30 - 8:00: Dinner with friends
8:00 - 9:00: Eucharistic Adoration (Holy Hour)
9:00 - 10:30: Drop-in/catching up with friends

Thursday

9:00 - 5:30: Work
5:30 - morning next day: Baby-sitting my four nephews/ catching up on homework after they are asleep

Friday

9:00 - 5:30: Work
6:00 - 7:00: Dinner with a Friend
7:15 - ?: Cleaning up my room (must be done)/hanging out with my sister

Saturday

8:30 - 6:00: Confirmation I retreat
6:00 - ?: NOTHING PLANNED!!! (possibly catch my breath)

So as you can see I will not have too much free time at all the rest of the week. I just wanted to put this up as a reminder to myself of what I have to do. I have a lot! There is just not enough time in the day....

It's The Possiblity That Excites Me

Tonight I had the pleasure of sitting down for a meeting with an amazing group of people over dinner. Fr. Bill took a group of us college students out to dinner and to talk about how we can help the high school youth group this year. Our parish is in search of a new youth minister, and since we will probably not find one till sometime next year we assembled this group to work together until the youth minister is hired. Usually the youth group is run by college students, so that is nothing too new for the parish. What is different right now is that the group will be much larger than usual, and it is filled with some pretty fun and very Catholic people.

Tonight we all decided that next month we will begin our youth group with a night of Eucharistic Adoration (I personally wanted to add the option of confession too, but that did not go over that well, sadly), pizza, ice breakers, games with prizes, and some sort of sporting event.... There will be notifications sent in the mail directly to the kids along with announcements made at each Mass. AT the next confirmation there will be a mandatory survey for the kids to fill out about what they want in the youth group. With their input hopefully we will have a nice turn-out. I am really feeling excited by the possibility of what the youth group can be. Hopefully it will be a great turn-out.

Eucharistic Procession Photos

Just a few photos from the Eucharistic Procession that was held this past Wed. evening.

Something Extraordinary

If you were a bystander on third street in my hometown, you would have witnessed something extraordinary... A Eucharistic Procession. It is not something that happens everyday and I am sure it was a sight to see for those people who had no idea was was coming at them.

It was a gorgeous fall evening for this beautiful and sacred procession. The night sky was clear and the whether was perfect. The air smelled of incense around us as the altar servers carried it with us. It was simply perfect.

I was part of the ninety or so people who made up our group. We prayed the rosary and the divine mercy chaplet. We also sang church hymns in between each decade of the prayers. It is a special connection between a group when we all know that what we are doing is important. It is bringing Christ out to others. It is about bringing the heart of our faith and putting it out there for all to see. Yes, there were a few who yelled out some not so nice things to us, but the majority of the people we crossed paths with were very respectful of us. We passed a few fraternity houses and the frat boys would come out and just stand and stare. When they were handed a card about what they were they would take it with interest. It was a memorable evening.

I do not have pictures right now of this event, but you can expect me to put some up as soon as I possibly can.

Wise Words From J.R.R. Tolkein

"Out of the darkness of my life, so much frustrated, I put before you the one great thing to love on earth: the Blessed Sacrament... There you will find romance, glory, honor, fidelity, and the true way of all your loves on earth, and more than that."

The above quote happens to be one of my very favorite quotes by J.R.R. Tolkien. It comes from a letter he wrote to his son about the importance of the Eucharist in everyone's spiritual journey. You can read the rest of it if you click here. It is a nice quick read with good advice.

Really there is nothing better than to spend time with Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament. I enjoy sometimes waking up in the middle of the night and quietly drive to the local church on a night I know there is Eucharistic Adoration. I tend to come in as quietly as possible so as not bother the other two people there praying there. It is amazing how much more relaxed I am after that.

I remember having to read the book, "The Screwtape Letters" back in high school. For those of you who have never heard of this book, it is by C.S. Lewis. It is a compilation of letters between the devil and his nephew about how to keep us from getting to Heaven. It is a very interesting book and I encourage you all to take a look at it. I recall one of the main points the devil was trying to get across to his nephew is to take advantage of how to drown out God's voice by filling everyone's life with as little amounts of silence as possible. It is in when we are silent that God speaks to us. Now that I am older I understand the need for that silence, and one of the best ways to fill that particular need is through adoration.

"Jesus, I Trust In You"

This evening after Mass I knelt down to say a few prayers, as I usually do. I noticed today however that went through these as though I were in a rush. I really had no particular place I needed to be, so I decided to stop and slow down. Whenever I close my prayers after Mass I tend to repeat a few of the same prayers.... "O Sacrament most holy, O Sacrament Divine, all praise and all thanksgiving be every moment Thine." along with repeating "Jesus I trust in You" a few times as well. Half the time, I admit, I will say those words and not really contemplate on what I am actually saying. It has become a habit for me because that is how my mother taught me to pray at the end of Mass. Growing up I did not understand the magnitude of those five words, "Jesus I trust in You." Oh, it is easy to claim that I trust in Jesus and God, but really it is extremely hard to do.

I am sure I have gone on about this before in one of my previous posts, the difficulty of truly placing all of my trust in God. I tend to fight that. There are a number of things going on in my life right now that I do not fully understand, and the selfish part of me does not want to hand everything over to God and Jesus because I am afraid that what I want is not what God wants. It is silly really to think of it in those terms, because God wants us to be happy in the end. Why fight so hard against what, in the back of my mind I know, will end up being the best for me? I suppose it is human nature. I need to pray even more for the strength to be alright with giving over everything to God. It is scary, but even though it does terrify me, what do I really have to lose?

Definition of Teresa McConnell: Child of God; Roman Catholic... That's Me!

There is an exercise we did during this past year's "holy" hours with the student life team. During one of our Eucharistic Adoration times we were supposed to write down who we thought we were... If someone were to ask who we were how would we answer... Other than just our names that is. What makes us who we are... I ended up pulling this out from under my bed today. I totally forgot about that exercise until I read it. Here is what I wrote out:

I am Teresa Allison McConnell, a child of God. I am a Catholic. I am the daughter of Danny and Suzanne McConnell. I am both a younger sister and an older one. I am a grand daughter, niece, and cousin. I am an Aunt with four beautiful nephews. I am a friend. I am not at all perfect. I am a sinner with the goal of ending up somehow as a saint. I am a caregiver. I am a teacher. I am a musician. I am a writer and a thinker. I try to be a peacemaker within my group of family and friends, but sometimes it does not work out that way. I am a listener and a shoulder to cry on when need be. I am a fighter and lover. I am unique, one of a kind. I am me.

After writing this all down we were supposed to narrow it down. If something were to happen to us that would cause us to not be able to do any of the above... say a freak accident that causes someone to lose sight or not be able to walk, then what would truly define who we were... It made us think about how really at the end of the day the only person we have to rely on is God and our faith... Being Catholic and a child of God, more than anything else, should be enough of an introduction for people to realize who we are. It was a good reflective exercise I must say.

"And the rain came falling down..."

Yesterday a couple of my friends and I went on a little road trip to The Mother of the Redeemer Farm. We ended up making it there in time for evening vespers... really we had no idea there would be evening vespers, so it was kind of cool. Impromtu Eucharistic adoration holy hour for us. After vespers we decided to take a walk down the huge hill. As soon as we made it to the bottom, what do you think happened to us? Lightning struck! Now, if you have been to the farm you would understand how frustrating it would be to make it back up this hill with the fear of being caught in a thunderstorm. My friends and I went huffing and puffing up that hill in record time. As soon as we made it to the top we were all pretty much dying. My calves were killing me and I just wanted to drop and not move. We made it inside my car right before it started raining, so it was some pretty perfect timing. Once we made it to the IU campus, one of the girls looked out and saw the rainbows that are in the photos above. I was so excited because I happened to have my family's camera with me. Since I was the driver I asked one of the girls if they would take the pictures for me. It was so beautiful to look at! It was a fun and adventurous trip up to the farm, if I do say so myself. :)

Moving on up to the "adult" table

Yesterday I spent the day up in Indy. My little second cousin/goddaughter received her first communion. She was asked to bring up a rose to Mary's statue during the Mass. She was so excited to have that role. She knew how important that day was and acted so well-behaved. It was an exciting moment watching her go up and receive Jesus for the first time.

After first communion we went over my cousin's house where we all ate a delicious Italian meal. We talked and joked around. It was a nice time with my family. I am so happy that I have some of my LARGE extended family so close by. :)

"Will you come and follow Me if I but call your name?"

In my hometown, this week-end happens to be known as "the best college week" thanks to the famous Little 500 week. It is the biggest "party" week of the year. Everyone seems to just use it as an excuse to get totally wasted. The students go a little crazy. That is why I was even more excited when the IU Catholic S.L.T. decided to put on another Eucharistic procession during this particular week. In the midst of partying we were able to bring Jesus, in the Blessed Sacrament to those on campus. We took him through the heart of it pretty much... down "frat row" is a nick name for it. There were some who were totally freaked-out by us... As we were praying the rosary, the Divine Mercy
Chaplet, and singing songs I noticed lots and lots of people pull out their cell phones to call their friends about what they were seeing. I glanced in some of the campus windows and saw people just staring out as we were passing. The Franciscan friars were passing out cards which explained what the procession was all about to the people we passed by. Some people took them, some looked at us like we were crazy, a few people would roll up their car windows when the friars were walking by their cars so that they would not have to talk to us. I am sure it was an interesting site to see for a lot of people... especially those who really had no clue about what we were doing and why we were doing it... I think my most memorable moment that made me laugh was when one of the servers went to hand a few guys one of the cards... the server walked up to the fraternity house and this incredibly drunk guy gave him a bear hug... and as the server walked away, he yelled out "So are you like Jewish or something?"

I have to say I am used to walking in March for Life walks. I am used to getting made fun of for standing up for the unborn, but as I walked in the Eucharistic procession it was so much more personal to me when I saw people who did not understand and kind of joked about it to the people around them. It was a humbling experience... I can honestly say I am so happy I was able to be a part of this.

If you look through the pictures below this paragraph I am in the second one. I am the girl with the bright pink shirt with the number 14 on the back... :)

Time To Finally Catch My Breath

I just really love the above picture. It is actually Pope Benedict who is holding up the monstrance. I decided to post it because tonight I had the blessing of being able to attend adoration. I went to it in such a good mood too because I finally heard from a friend of mine who I have been praying about a lot lately. He had been in a very depressed mood and I was seriously starting to worry about him. After a few months of not hearing a thing from him he finally called my family. He is supposed to be my brother's confirmation sponsor so he was calling to check-up on some things. I was so excited when I heard how happy his voice was over the phone. He is in a really good place right now which made my day to finally know.

As I said I was in a mood of thankfulness tonight going into adoration. I find relief while sitting there in reverent silence with so many other young Catholics in the room finding that same kind of solace as I do. What was really neat about tonight's though is that there was a thunderstorm going on outside. It was not a scary one, but a light one. The sound of the rain and the thunder in the background made adoration seem even more peaceful and relaxing.

Another part of adoration that I love is how I feel like I can catch my breath during that time. I sit down and talk to God and during that time it seems as if time kind of stops and freezes after awhile. It is refreshing and rejuvenating.

After adoration was over I looked at a few of my friends and said how much better I felt, and they both laughed at me and said that they were just thinking the exact same thing. I am so blessed to be close to this group where so often we are all thinking the exact same thing. It is kind of weird how much we all have in common. A group of friends like this particular one does not happen so often, and so I am relishing the little time I have left with them before the end of this school year.

I am so blessed to have the community of faith that I have. :)

Tonight was a refreshing kind of night spent with great fellowship. It was "holy" hour here in town, and tonight we broke a record of attendance. There were I think 26 of us that came. A large part of that had to do with the publicity given to it at the end of my kairos retreat, but I feel like I helped by kind of pushing my small group to come along. It was so much fun being with these people. St. Paul's on Wed. nights has quickly become a nice place to just fall after a week of craziness. The people that have come every week have become a nice community that prays and worships in Eucharistic adoration together and then during drop-in it is so nice to just catch up with everyone. Talk about the happenings that went on in our lives. I have come to really enjoy Wed. nights! I love my group there dearly.

"Holy" hour is not the only place I have a strong community of people who live out their faith. At St. Charles, my home parish, I have just as many dear friends. Every Sunday night we meet up and have a Bible study. The funny thing about this Bible study is that there is just as much catching up with each other and joking around and getting off topic as there is in studying the Bible. I have learned so much more about the Scripture than I knew before I went to this Bible study. I have found myself reading ahead of what we are supposed to just because I have really finally been interested in the stories... Right now I am in the middle of the book of Joshua. Go me!

Without these two groups of friends I think my life would have been so much more depressing for me. I have realized that having faith and trying to follow it is SO SO SO much easier when I surround myself with the people who are trying to do the same. So to all of my friends I have met while working on retreats and teaching Confirmation classes and praying in front of the Blessed Sacrament, and going to Mass together with, I just want to say I am eternally grateful to God that I met each and every one of you! You will always have a place in my heart.