"Jesus, I Trust In You"

This evening after Mass I knelt down to say a few prayers, as I usually do. I noticed today however that went through these as though I were in a rush. I really had no particular place I needed to be, so I decided to stop and slow down. Whenever I close my prayers after Mass I tend to repeat a few of the same prayers.... "O Sacrament most holy, O Sacrament Divine, all praise and all thanksgiving be every moment Thine." along with repeating "Jesus I trust in You" a few times as well. Half the time, I admit, I will say those words and not really contemplate on what I am actually saying. It has become a habit for me because that is how my mother taught me to pray at the end of Mass. Growing up I did not understand the magnitude of those five words, "Jesus I trust in You." Oh, it is easy to claim that I trust in Jesus and God, but really it is extremely hard to do.

I am sure I have gone on about this before in one of my previous posts, the difficulty of truly placing all of my trust in God. I tend to fight that. There are a number of things going on in my life right now that I do not fully understand, and the selfish part of me does not want to hand everything over to God and Jesus because I am afraid that what I want is not what God wants. It is silly really to think of it in those terms, because God wants us to be happy in the end. Why fight so hard against what, in the back of my mind I know, will end up being the best for me? I suppose it is human nature. I need to pray even more for the strength to be alright with giving over everything to God. It is scary, but even though it does terrify me, what do I really have to lose?