This lent I decided that among other stuff the main thing I have given up is to stop snacking on junk food... I am trying not to snack much at all really unless I really do need it, like an apple or fresh carrots... things like that.
I have come to realize through this little endeavor of mine is that it is starting to take a toll on my own self-control. It is a good thing though. I know that self-control is something that I should always try to work on, especially in the society I've grown up in. Here in America everything is about what "I" think I want think I need, and getting it as soon as possible. Drugs, alcohol, sex, all these things are apparent here and so easy to find really if one wants it bad enough. Really though, the whole, "it's all about me thing," is not at all the best perspective to have, especially while trying to live a good Catholic/Christian life. Focusing on what I want takes away the whole reason why I love to be Catholic. Being Catholic and trying to be a positive role model and living by example has to be the exact opposite of the "I" theory. It has to be about God. I have to focus my attention on God and what He wants for me. I need to let Him lead me, and to be quite honest that is one of the scariest things for me to really do.
This self-control idea is actually helping me be even more okay with finding out the path God wants me to follow. Yes, it still scares me a lot to think about the plans He may have for me, because they may not at all be the one's I would ever have wanted to choose for myself. I am slowly understanding that if I want to hear God's plans for me than I have to allow myself to be totally open and as prepared as possible for whatever it is, and I think this may be one of the first big steps for me to take. I guess I will find out if I am right or not.
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