Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Pick-up Lines for Catholics

I was messing around on facebook and found this list of pick-up lines.... I thought it was amusing and thought I'd share.

1. Confess here often?
2. Did you feel what I felt when we reached into the holy water font at the
same time?
3. You've got stunning scapular-brown eyes.
4. I bet I can guess your confirmation name.
5. Let's get out of here. I know a much cozier little Catholic bookstore
downtown.
6. You don't like the culture of death either? Wow! We have so much in
common!
7. What's a nice girl like you doing at a First Saturday Rosary Cenacle
like this?
8. Sorry, but I couldn't help but noticing how cute you look in that
ankle-length, shapeless, plaid jumper.
9. Hi there. My buddy and I were wondering if you would settle a dispute
we're having. Do you think the word should be pronounced HOMEschooling, or
homeSCHOOLing?
10. May I offer you a light for that votive candle?
11. You don't have an accountability partner? Me neither.
12. The Bible says "Give drink to those who are thirsty, and feed the
hungry"; how about dinner?
13. You look so beautiful in that mantilla you wear to Mass
14. Want to go to Adoration with me?
15. I didn't believe in predestination till I met you.
16. Man does not live by bread alone. So how about dinner and a
movie?
17. What do you think Peter meant when he said, "Greet everyone with a holy
kiss" (1Pet 5:14)?18. A little bird... the Holy Spirit actually... tells me we
should get to know each other a little better.
19. Do you need help carrying your Bible? It looks heavy.
20. What are your plans for tonight? Feel like a Bible study?
21. Hi, this pew taken?
22. My prayers are answered.
23. What's a charismatic like you doing in a mainline place like
this?
24. Don't worry, I'm attracted to you purely in a spiritual way.
25. What's your name and number so I can add you to my "prayer" list?
26. Has anyone ever told you, your eyes are like doves and your neck like
the tower of David
27. Oh you are cold, Ecclesiastes 4:11.
28. You have the body of Amy Grant and the soul of Mother Teresa.
29. Am I the only one who sees the sign of the beast in the Volkswagon
logo?3
0. Read any good Bible passages lately?
31. Wow that grey/black ash smudge on your forehead, vaguely resembling a
cross, really brings out the tones in your skin.
32. You know Jesus? Hey, me too! (from Brittney Quirk)
33. God told me to come talk to you. (from Brittney Quirk)
34. How about a hug, sister? (from Brittney Quirk)
35. Would you happen to know a Christian man/woman that I could love with
all my heart and wait on hand and foot? (from Brittney Quirk)
36. Do you believe in Divine appointment? (from Brittney Quirk)
37. My friend told me to come and meet you, he said that you are a really
nice person. I think you know him. Jesus, yeah, that's his name. (from Brittney
Quirk)
38. You look like a good vocation (from Stephen Bonnette)
39. I lost my rosary, can I use your fingers? (from David Napoli)
40. Hey ... I don't want to embarass you but your Scapular strap is
showing. So ... how long have you been wearing that? We should discuss the
Sabatine promises over a 40 hours devotion sometime. (from Robert Klesko)
41. You're so fine, you're divine! (from Thomas F. Varacalli)
42. “It’s Palm Sunday, may I hold your palm?” (from Walker Solis)
43. “A girl like you only comes along once in a Blue Army meeting.” (from
Walker Solis)
44. At a charismatic assembly: “Slain here often”? (from Walker
Solis)
45. Presenting a rose: “I just may be the answer to your Little Flower
novena.” (from Walker Solis)
46. Thumbing a rosary: “How ‘bout joining me for a few decades?” (from
Walker Solis)
47. “Me, I prefer a more traditional Mass. I’m a regular Latin lover.”
(from Walker Solis)
48. “You look like (an officially approved) apparition!” (from Walker
Solis)
49. “You’re a saint! Kiss me, and make me a second-class relic!” (from
Walker Solis)
50. “If loving you’s a heresy, consider me anathema!” (from Walker
Solis)
51. "Where did you find such an exquisite St. Christopher medal?" (from
Jennifer Salame)
52. "Can I hold your hand during the Our Father?" (from Alyssa
Collins)
53. "My Guardian Angel thinks you are cute"(from Aaron Russell)
54. "Let me get your number; I know this great place to go to on Sunday
mornings. They have the best wine!"(from Chad A. Dubiel)
55. "Wedding and onions always make me cry. Which do you like better: onion
rings or wedding rings?" (from Walker Solis)
56. "You must be the eighth wonder of the world because I'm smack dab
between seventh heaven and cloud nine right now." (from Walker Solis)
57. "Is that a new perfume or the odor of sanctity?" (from Walker
Solis)
58. "So YOU'RE the third secret of Fatima?!" (from Walker Solis)
59. "In the dark void of this world, could you be my luminous mystery?"
(from Stephanie Adams)
60. "Dinner. My Place. Tomorrow. Don't argue; it's a feast of obligation."
(from Ben Cohen)
61. If I had a bead for every time I though of you, I'd have a joyful
mystery. (from John DeLozier)
62. My sacred heart of Jesus statue started beating faster when I saw you!
(from Corrie Christiaansen)
63. I love that new Benediction Incense scent on you. (from Alexa
Schuele)
64. hey.. do you wanna take the church van for a spin?(from Corrie
Christiaansen )
65. You are like the book of Revelation. You've got me all confused. (from
Christa Masson)
66. "May I be the ish in your ishah?"(from Corrie Christiaansen)
67. "My, you sure do look cute up there in a cassock and surplice."(from
Mary Thein)
68. "Can I pray for you?" (from Jacob Valle)
69. "I was wrong about the Latin Mass, because YOU are the most beautiful
thing this side of Heaven."
70. "Your parents had 13 children too?" (from Wade Pittman)
71. "Which choir of angels do you belong to?" (from Dante De Luca)

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