"The Real Me"

The other night while I was looking around for some more good quotes to put in my quote books, I happened to find a quote that matches my personality so close;

"I'm the kind of girl you can hear from miles. The kind that if she sees you sad it's her job to make you happy. The girl who keeps messing up and says, 'oops, sorry.' I trip over everything. I am such a clutz. I get so mad at the simplest things. But I am also the girl who holds everything back. If you ask me what's wrong, I'll just lie and smile saying 'nothing.' The girl who is afraid to love because she's already lost so much."

I think there must be something in the water in my house because everyone all seems to be in crabby and short tempered moods. I've been down because of saying bye to so many people and guy problems and not too happy about going back to school. I am still in denial about classes starting back for me in a little over a week and I am still unprepared for the chaos that my life will be. I hope and pray that with the craziness of this upcoming semester I will not die from exhaustion. I foresee many late nights full of homework and then waking up early to work with the kids at the daycare followed by class and homework.... the cycle will never stop repeating itself for this next year.... So in my grumpy mood I turned on an old cd I haven't listened to in so long just to listen to something different for a change. The song below came on, and I swear it says pretty much how I am feeling and thinking at the moment.

"The Real Me"
Jaci Velasquez

People think I've got it all together
With the show and my sweet, sweet smile
But do they know if I've been happy ever
Pull up a chair 'cause this may take a while
O.K. so here's the thing

I've got my bad days, and some are even worse
I can be a blessing and you know, I can be a curse
I tremble at rejection, I'm scared to be alone
Sometimes I may be selfish, but I always make it home

This is the real me
Am I the girl that you want me to be
This is the real me
With flaws and fears of intimacy
This is the real me
Can you face it
Can you feel it
Can you take it
Can you deal with
The real me

So now you see that I am far from perfect
I will fall and I will make mistakes (oh, no)
But I am here and this has taken courage
Will you abandon me or will you stay
(Please stay with me)

I know that I'm demanding and sometimes insecure
I think I've got the answers, but then I'm not so sure
I sometimes need attention a little more than I should
But there is a part of me that would give the whole world if I could

This is the real me
Am I the girl that you want me to be
This is the real me
With flaws and fears of intimacy
This is the real me
Can you face it
Can you feel it
Can you take it
Can you deal with
The real me

Now I've gone and let you in
And I no longer will pretend
Will you please still be my friend
Will you please still be my friend
Do you see me now

This is the real me
Am I the girl that you want me to be
This is the real me
Real me

This is the real me
Am I the girl that you want me to be
This is the real me
With flaws and fears of intimacy
This is the real me
Can you face it
Can you feel it
Can you take it
Can you deal with
The real me